How To Recognize and Deal with Holiday Triggers

While the holidays are generally a time that we look forward to and can be a time of great joy and fun, for some it is a time of stress, anxiety, and challenges—particularly if you are dealing with the challenges associated with addiction. The holidays can become a combination of stress, anxiety, social gatherings, and unrealistic expectations that have the potential to create the “perfect storm” of increased triggers and the negative consequences of unhealthy coping skills associated with these triggers.

One of the biggest holiday triggers is stress. This stress can come from unrealistic expectations to create the “perfect” holiday experience—from buying (or affording) a perfect gift, preparing and making holiday meals, and getting our house ready for out-of-town family and guests, to simply spending extended periods of time with those out-of-town family and guests. This stress can also come from decorating the house or from the loneliness of spending the holiday without someone we have lost.

It’s important to remember that if you are experiencing any of this, you are not alone, you don’t have to handle it on your own, and it doesn’t mean that there is something “wrong” with you.

Some tips to keep in mind while navigating the stress associated with the holidays can be the following:Remember that nothing has to be, or should be, perfect. Set realistic expectations for yourself.

Life is 10 percent what happens to us and 90 percent how we perceive what happens to us! Not only do we need to keep realistic expectations of ourselves, but we also need to remember to keep everything in its proper perspective. We are our own worst critic. Remember to enjoy the process and embrace the imperfections, because they often lead to lasting memories that would otherwise be lost!

Don’t forget to prioritize healthy boundaries and healthy self-care skills. Let family and friends know where and when you need help with something. Don’t overextend yourself, and remember the importance of maintaining your self-care items such as rest and sleep, eating healthy, and taking time for yourself—whether that be meditation, going for a walk, working out, or simply spending some quiet time alone.

In addition to the added stress that the holidays can bring, it is also important to remember that the holidays can bring some unexpected emotions into our lives as well. Some of these emotions can be overwhelming, and we may turn to substances or other self-medicating coping mechanisms to numb and deal with this roller coaster of emotions and feelings in the moment.

Some more effective, healthy ways to deal with these overwhelming emotions can be:

Journaling: There is power in pen to paper. Journaling gives us the opportunity not to keep our emotions and feelings bottled up inside and provides a tool to get them out in the open. Journaling also offers a tool for potential closure and for keeping things in perspective.

Seeking out our support system: Don’t isolate yourself. Reach out to family and friends. Also remember that seeking professional help is not a sign of weakness; knowing our limitations and when to ask for help is a sign of strength.

Being honest about your feelings of stress, anxiety, loneliness, or being overwhelmed. Mindfulness is the skill of knowing where your thoughts and feelings are throughout the day in different situations. It’s not the feelings and emotions that are inherently good or bad; it’s what we do with those feelings and emotions.

One of the most important tools when dealing with stress—not just holiday-related stress—is recognizing, understanding, and accepting that we all go through difficult times when we feel alone or overwhelmed. When we are able to recognize these stress-related triggers, we can more effectively prepare ourselves for them and seek out the necessary help and support that we all need at different times in our lives.

It is important to remember that once again, you are not alone in these struggles, and with the right support, strategies, and resources, along with keeping the proper perspective, we can enjoy the holidays and the joy that this time can represent.

Remember: there is no greater advocate for yourself and your well-being than yourself! Don’t hesitate to reach out for support and assistance when you need it!

-Written by Mark Kakos, LCDC

LifeSpring Behavioral Health

Mark is a Licensed Chemical Dependency Counselor specializing in dual-diagnosis care.

LifeSpring Behavioral Health

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