Father's Day gift shopping: A lesson in practicality and anthropolgy

THE WOODLANDS, Texas -- When shopping for Father’s Day, think practical...socks and underwear. More than likely that’s what dad will say when asked what he really needs. He probably does need socks and underwear, but dads are special, and that warrants a special gift.

Even special gifts have to be practical though. It’s deeply rooted in anthropology. Men devised the weapons and tools necessary to survive during the caveman period, whereas women decorated the caves. You’re not going to change millions of years of evolution, so look for special, but practical gifts.

Speaking of caves…something unique for his ‘man cave’ would make an interesting gift. If he’s into making craft beer, beer signs and beer memorabilia would be appropriate. Even better if the item is something that can actually be put to good use, like beer tap handles. Hobbies like photography, fishing, or NASCAR, are easy to find decor for. Check local antique shops, flea markets, and hobby shops.

Books on topics of interest are always a great gift idea. Even better if it’s a bestseller or First Edition, an even better if autographed by the author.

An antiquity or vintage collectible makes a unique gift, but it still needs to be practical and have a utilitarian purpose. Art glass dishes or retro 1950s ashtrays are great for dad’s spare change and keys, and the dish would prevent his dresser from getting marred.

It doesn’t get more practical than a pocket knife. Every man needs a handy pocket knife to open a box, cut twine, or scrape gum off the bottom of his shoe. Pocket knives come in all price ranges depending on the quality and the number of blades and implements. Too bulky a knife will wear a hole in his trousers, and it must feel comfortable in his hand; large hands require a larger pocket knife.

(To see examples of the items mentioned, view the link provided.)

If he’s truly adamant about the socks and underwear, make sure of the size and dad’s preferred brands...a gift card would be best. But then shopping is another one of those anthropological concepts. Women were the berry pickers and went from bush to bush collecting the harvest. That’s why they make excellent shoppers. Men on the other hand, would run out and club the dinosaur and drag back to the cave. They had to be quick. It was kill or be killed. That’s why men don’t have the patience for shopping. Forget the gift card for socks and underwear.